On a backside theme, how about Dean Windass, Nicky Butt, and Andre Arshavin? One of the most inappropriately named was Mike England who was manager of Wales.

On its own David Seaman is worth just a sn----r, but included in the joke about why did the Brazilian birth rate rise after the 2002 World Cup? Because they could lob seaman from 40 yards gets a smile even from England fans!

Boo Weekly..

Hi Sue, I like KAKA and DUDU on the pitch at the same time????Shocking!.........My old dentist in Swaffham Norfolk was genuinly called Doctor Screech!...Never had to wait toooo long for an appointment tho!...........

My friends you are, as always, inspirational! Kaka and Dudu made me laugh out loud. I had forgotten both of them. In fact Brazil is a rich source of rude names. They had an Olympic sailor who beat the lovely Ben Ainslie to gold in Atlanta. He was the wonderfully named Robert Sheidt and if I tell you the 'd' is silent, well you get the picture......

There were also a couple of 1980s Polish (I think), olympians, pole vaulter and track athlete named Pissiaski and Bouziaski??? Check spelling!...Don't forget ARSHAVIN Sue???? It could catch on???....